I normally only push out one blog post in a week, but I felt as though this post may be for someone this week other than myself. So, I am sitting here on a Wednesday night after church about to share a bit of my heart and tomorrow I will post my small revelation and share my growth with you. I hope this post ministers to someone.
Since I was about eighteen I have referred to Valentines Day as “Single Awareness Day”. Why? I did it to validate myself in the waiting for the guy God has for me and I did it to hide the hurt and feelings of loneliness that often overwhelmed me. Not wanting anyone to see how I really felt to see everyone celebrating, I used my sarcasm to make a joke out of it all. Sarcasm and humor are my coping mechanisms.
Now if you haven’t figured out what I am about to say, God has been dealing with my heart and giving me his perspective. I no longer feel the need to cover up what I feel about this holiday. I am acknowledging the growth in myself and preparing for the next season. Love is in the day to day living and learning, not in the great flourishes and extravagancies of holidays. Don’t get me wrong, every girl loves the extravagance, but we would all be lying if we said those things meant more to us than the little day to day moments.
So what is his view? What is his heart? What is perspective? Well, take a look at these biblical examples:
Jacob & Rachel (Genesis 29:1 – 30)
Solomon & his beloved (Songs of Solomon/Songs 1:1 – 8:14)
Issac & Rebecca (Genesis 24:1 – 66)
Boaz & Ruth (Ruth 1:1 – 4:22)
What is the common thread in each of these? The thread is this, the Father directed them to their mate and they listened. Do I expect God to step down to the earth and pull me towards the man he has for me and say, “here he is”? Not literally, but yes sort of. I expect to hear the voice of my Father because I am intently listening and then go where he leads. I refuse to step where he hasn’t told me to step and I refuse to run towards a guy just because it is expected of me.
Today and every day I celebrate the waiting and I prove my love for my husband to be, even if I haven’t met him, by being humble. My day to day refusal to crack jokes about my “singleness” honors him and my acknowledgement of his love for me is shown in my remaining steadfast and true in the promise of my Father. My heart still longs for this Godly man to come walking into my life, but my patience will be well worth the wait. My eyes are fixed on the Father and my focus is on who he is in all of his intricacies.